In case you have any interest or desire in hanging out with the ghosts of movie actors, head on over to the HLYWD ONE ARRIVAL at Los Angeles (KLAX). There you will find Marilyn Monroe (MNROE), Bette Midler (MDLER), Steve McQueen (MCQWN), Clint Eastwood (ESTWD), Paul Newman (NWMAN), Charlie Chaplin (CHPLN), Clark Gable (GABBL) and Henry Fonda or one of his children (FNNDA).
Every IFR pilot knows the joys and sorrows of routing. Flying home from Massachusetts one afternoon, I heard the following exchange:
NY controller: “King Air XXXX, climb and … disregard.”
NY controller: “I’ll be right back with you.”
On final to Boeing Field 14R on a blustery Pacific Northwest fall day a Gulfstream reported wind shear upon landing.
Gulfstream 123: “15 knot wind shear.”
Tower: “What was your location when you encountered the wind shear?”
Gulfstream 123: “About 300 feet.”
Tower: “Baron 581CB did you copy that?”
Baron 581CB: “Affirmative.”
Tower: “Citation 425 did you copy that report.”
Citation 425: “Yee ha!”
One day on my way to Nashville, I overheard the following:
American 1234: “Good morning Atlanta Center. American 1234 checking in. Out of 23 for 12 thousand.”
Atlanta Center: “Good morning American 1234, say indicated airspeed.”
American 1234: “320 knots.”
Atlanta Center: “For spacing into Charlotte, I need you to slow to 260 knots.”
American 1234: “Aw, man, you’re killing me.”
Atlanta Center: “So, do you remember the old saying, ‘It hurts me as much as it hurts you?'”
American 1234: “Yes.”
Atlanta Center: “Sorry, it doesn’t apply today!”
We were shooting the GPS RWY 11 approach into Nampa, Idaho, IMC, talking to Big Sky Approach. I noticed that we were to fly right over the Caldwell Airport, which is about 7 miles west of Nampa. My traffic advisory system showed lots of unseen traffic right over the airport.
Bonanza 22U: “Big Sky, Bonanza 22U, it looks like this approach goes right over the Caldwell Airport.”
Big Sky: “It does.”
Bonanza 22U: “Big Sky, my TAS shows a lot of traffic right in our flight path over the airport.”
Big Sky: “There is.”
Bonanza 22U: “Big Sky, that seems a little dangerous.”
Big Sky: “It is.”
I was contemplating taciturn Idaho controllers, and whether to break off the approach or not, when another voice said:
“Bonanza, broadcast on Caldwell Unicom your position and altitude, and tell them to stay VFR. They are under the overcast.”
I did so, continued the approach, and broke out well above minimums at Nampa.
Bonanza 22U: “Big Sky, Nampa in sight.”
Big Sky: “Good job.”
We certainly didn’t hog the airwaves that afternoon!
In Alaska, runway obstructions can be different. And large. Yes, there are the usual bears and moose. But sometimes it’s really big:
Last December the following NOTAM was part of the ATIS at Ketchikan International Airport:
“Notices to Airman, there is a sunken ship in the Ketchikan harbor, East-west seaplane lane, on the west end.”
These are new, but we’re always running right on the edge. Don’t want returns? Send us your cleverest or most embarrassing moment on the radio—or your favorite fix names or airport names—with a subject of “OTA,” toIFR@BelvoirPubs.com. Be sure to include your full name and location.