We’re expanding OTA a bit to include funny fix names. While most of us get a good chuckle from the work of a clever TERPSter, few of these cute names find their way beyond the local airport crowd. With your help, we’re going to change that to recognize pure genius when we find it. Please send us your favorites. Extra credit given for sequences of fixes. —Editor
On the RNAV (GPS) RWY 33 approach to Kingston-Ulster airport in New York, the intermediate approach fix is ITTLE and the final approach fix is BFINE.
Ellenville, New York
In the New York Class B, the following conversation took place at the typical rapid fire pace of the Kennedy Approach frequencies:
Kennedy Approach: “Exec Jet Seventy Six, what was your climb rate out of Kennedy?”
Exec Jet 76: “It’s 5000 feet per minute. Is that too fast for you?”
Kennedy: “No, but that’s quite a rate!”
Exec Jet 76: “I’ve done 8700 in this thing.”
Kennedy: “Whaddya got—afterburners on it?”
Exec Jet 76: “Nah, we’re just skinny pilots.”
I was departing Teterboro in my Mooney Ovation, with a 15-knot tailwind. I was at 3000 feet on the departure when I head an Airbus departing from Newark.
Airbus: “Departure, is that a Mooney in front of us?”
Airbus: “Wow. He is really moving.”
Doing my best Ricky Bobby: “I wanna go fast!”
J. P. Engelbrecht
One morning we heard the following leaving Richmond Executive Airport:
Delta 123: “Washington Center, we’d like to request the Falcon 8 arrival into Atlanta. But we don’t want to be a problem.”
Washington Center: “No problem. I just yell at my supervisor and he yells at the Traffic Management folks. Then, they tell Atlanta.”
Delta 123: “I really hate all that yelling!”
Washington Center: “Me too!”
Every time I fly into Louisville, Kentucky, the main hub for UPS, I get a kick out of a couple of the fix names: UPSCO and PARCL. Of course there’s BRBON, too—after all, it is Kentucky.
I was working Potomac Approach during the recent government shutdown, when I heard this exchange between the pilot of a Patient Airlift Services (PALS) flight to Blacksburg, Virginia and the controller.
Potomac: “November One Two Three Four Five, current ATIS at Dulles is Charlie. Expect delays due to traffic.”
November One Two Three Four Five (with a bit of disinterest): “Yeah approach. That’s alright. We get paid by the hour.”
Potomac (back at him without missing a beat): “At least you’re getting paid.”
Lumberton, New Jersey
I was flying through Indianapolis Center airspace when I heard the following exchange:
Center: “Warrior One Two Three Four, climb and maintain 8000, cross SOME intersection at or above 6500.”
The Warrior acknowledged, and a few moments later Center offered an alternative.
Center: “Warrior One Two Three Four, if you are unable to make that, let me know and I’ll coordinate a change for you.”
Warrior One Two Three Four: “I think we can do this.”
Center: “Okay, don’t hurt anyone.”
I was in my Cherokee 140 flying toward the IAF for the GPS-A approach to William T. Piper Memorial Airport, when Center called me.
New York Center: “Cherokee Three Four Romeo, cross CAXOP at or above flight level, uh, waitaminnit, disregard that! Cross CAXOP at or above 4100. Report inbound.”
Howard K. Congdon
Lock Haven, Pennsylvania